God moves in mysterious ways. It appears the religious icon of the Aquarian Age has descended upon us with the compensatory fire and fervor such grace imbues. Before we imbibe fully of this Biblical fruition, I want to share with you the prophetic text I have selected to support this new idol, for no supersessionist teaching subsists on its own merit. It must undergo scriptural peer review.
Micah 3:10 says, "Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in mine house, and prove me now herewith, saith the Lord of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it."
The appearance of the implement for such pouring has been ushered in by the current economic crisis! All the proverbial tithes are in the storehouse thanks to exploitative efforts of the 1%, in whom we trust. With unilateral decisions such as the Patient Protection and Affordable Care Act (PPACA) and the epic swaths of Red Tape used by the bureaucratic pawns of said percentile, the tithes have been neatly relegated into the hands of the pharaohs, and we, impoverished humanity, have suffered our share of Piscean piss upon!
Behold a new symbol of trickle down for thirsty lands!
My prophetic friend and colleague, (I'll call him Brother Brody), found his own sacred artifact in the woods near his abode. Moved by the spirit, he promptly sent me this photo of his destined discovery. He has started a not-for-profit religious organization in hopes of raising funds to build a shrine around this blessed miracle, metaphor for socialist-corporatist ruse and the relinquishment of life-force into the hands of our capable shepherds, who promise to ration out our hydration in moral measure for the "greatest good".
For more information, or to donate, you may write to Brother Brody's Crazy Watering Can Foundation at holyhuckster@trustmeyouneedmeandmyhandycansoyoucan.org
Let the Age of the Water Bearer begin!
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